Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.
— W. Cosby
It’s probably the question I hear the most, the question I hear from strangers, family, neighbors, friends, bloggers. I don’t mind the question–I understand why people ask, actually. It can be asked a couple of different ways, but is essentially asking the same thing. It’s just that it’s a question that doesn’t have an easy answer, a question that begs an explanation that spans a couple decades of experience and growth and faith and fear.
“Are you going to have any more? Are you done?”
The question is about our family size, are we going to have more than the eight we’ve been blessed with, are we done expanding the tribe. I recognize that in today’s American culture we are far more the exception than the norm. I get why people are interested, why they allow curiosity to overcome what might be considered a personal question. It’s a question I might be tempted to ask, were I in their shoes. It’s a question I did ask, many years ago, when I became dear friends with an amazing woman who has seven children.
There is an assumption that Michael and I set out to build a large family, but this was not the case. Our plan included the development of his law and political career, which I would support through my burgeoning media opportunities. We would focus exclusively on our careers for about a decade, then take a three month sabbatical to the Greek Isles, whereupon I would ovulate on a timetable, we would conceive and presto, bingo, right on schedule, right when we had our careers headed for zenith, right when we had a certain amount of dollars in the bank, right when we had our dream home built and furnished, then there would be Baby.
Imagine the shock to the 10 year plan when 7 months into the marriage I took a pregnancy test that registered a positive result. Imagine M’s shock when I went from full-out television career woman to a gestating soon-to-be mommy who in a blink decided to ditch my career to stay home with the spawn. Fifteen months into our marriage we welcomed 1 of 8, 105 months shy of the designated time we had set aside for her arrival.
I really thought she would be an only child. Tough delivery, tough financial times, tough strain on a young marriage. Incredible little girl, incredible bond, incredible growth. The balance of a baby in tow.
Now here comes the part with the strong disclaimer: the following assertions are only for the description of my journey into grand multipara motherhood. They are not intended as theology. They are not intended to say my conclusions are ‘right’ and all others are ‘wrong’. They are not meant as a universal revelation leading to enlightenment, growth and maturity, although I do find that fruit through my experience. I’m just one woman, trying to listen to the leading.
Perhaps in the future I will post in more detail the arrivals of 2-8, but for the purposes of this post, I’ll try to be brief. After 2’s arrival, we thought we were done. After 3’s arrival, we thought we were done. After 4’s arrival, Michael really thought we were done…and I wasn’t so sure. After 5’s arrival, I begged for 6. After 6’s arrival, I thought we were done. And then there were 7 & 8.
What I have found is this: it’s all about faith. It’s all about trust. It’s all about listening. I don’t know how many children people should have. I do know we should pray a whole lot more about it. I don’t think that big families are somehow more ‘spiritual’. I do know that the process of family building is holy ground, whether by biological or adoptive or foster or mentoring means. I don’t have the answers to all things reproduction. I do think we need to quit thinking in terms of ‘what can I handle’ and think instead ‘how can I be stretched.’ We tend to make decisions in this arena based in fear, not in faith…and then that is no real decision based in the Lord at all.
We’ve had easy pregnancies, we’ve had hard ones. I’ve had some fast, smooth labors and I’ve had some zingers. We’ve had two miscarriages. We’ve had times we hoped to be pregnant and weren’t. We have two girls with special needs. We have eight children who all come with their own individuals strengths and weaknesses. We are two people with strengths and weaknesses. We mess up. We get back up. We are blessed.
So in the end, the answer is this: we are standing on holy ground. To be invited by an infinitely creative Creator to participate in such an amazing way to make people is holy. To see those people enter our lives is miraculous. To look in each of the faces around our dinner table, to know that we thought we were probably done with the baby thing after 1, then after 2, then after 3…sometimes my heart is in my throat as I think, “What if I had called it quits? You wouldn’t be here! I would have missed the amazing miracle of you…”…wow. That’s heavy.
I don’t have it all figured out. My cup feels very full. Therapy for two of my girls is sometimes overwhelming. Laundry for ten takes a lot of time. I have goals, dreams, things I would like to do. But in the end, I would have never grown into the person I am were it not for the cradle crucible of self-sacrifice, joy, heartache, physical pain, stretch marks, delight, laughter, exhaustion and adoration that these children have made me. Maybe it took this many kids to grow me up.
Are we done? Yes…no….maybe….I’m listening. This is holy ground.
So what about you? So how about your family? Are you done? Are you just beginning? What questions, fears, dreams have shaped the number of people in your family? How do you know if there may be someone else lining up for membership in your family club? How do you know when the club is complete?
Well said!! Keep listening to your heart because it guides you well.
I loved your post! What a great question! I have begun my answer and plan to post it on my blog. However, due to the busyness of the school year beginning, coupled with the fact that I have much to say in my answer, it may be a few days before it’s posted. I’ll let you know when it’s up. Have a wonderful Monday š
Thank you SO much for this post! Itās a question Iām really struggling with at the moment. I have polycystic ovaries and was led to believe that I could have problems conceiving. At which point I did a lot of work on myself, and focussed on having a positive career, and everyone reassured me that I was still a part of the family even if I never went on to have children and that my calling may just be in another direction – after which I conceived naturally twice!
Of course, because Iām an extreme person and I like to do things to the max, Iām now feeling that we should try for number three, but my husband feels that two is enough. And while there is always enough love, heās right that the finances, time and space would be stretched by any more children.
I feel that I should be thankful for the two fantastic children I have, (after resigning myself to not having any) and not be greedy by asking for more. But thereās a little voice in me I canāt quite ignore.
Thanks for sharing!
What a beautiful post! I have so much respect for you and your beautiful family. I, myself, am just starting with one ten month old. I feel like I will have 3 children, but if I have the feeling that there are more beautiful spirits waiting, than I am more willing to bring them into the world. I truly believe a size of a family is between a wife, husband, and the Lord.
Hello again,
Let me know if you and/or your husband are ever available. I understand schedules are busy. I am fine if it is a family activity :).
Caleb
calebhobart@mac.com
469-337-1707
What a wonderful post! I don’t think I ever would have asked why you chose to have children, but I found much in your post. Thank you for sharing, for putting yourself out there.
OM – I must say that was a very honest post, of course I expect nothing less from you, but I appreciate your sharing your take on having a large family. Too bad you can’t just have people press a hyperlink that directs them here when they ask you “are you done?”
By the way, pun intended or not, “how can I be stretched” was kinda funny. After 8 children I am sure anyone would be asking that. š
Good hearing from you.
I love how you answered this question. I can’t believe you didn’t start out wanting a big family. š I think the same thing about my children……what if we had stopped at 1 or 2 or 3? We wouldn’t have all that we do, and that would be a travesty indeed! My post will be publishing tomorrow, so I’ll add to Mr. Linky then.
Wow, another wonderful insightful look into your life. I was curious about how your big family happened so this answered it. Love your “how can I be stretched” statement so much!!! As for us, we’re done at one and we’re very happy with the way life is BUT if another came along I would embrace it, knowing that’s what was supposed to happen.
Wow, I just LOVE this. YOu probably wouldn’t be surprised to know I get this question ALL the time too –and I only have 3. I have had one friend who has told me — “Seriously, you are overpopulated the world! ” I was in shock. I assume she was kinda joking—but still!!! I love that you listen. I agree it is different with each family but I have often had the thought that if others listened–families would grow once again. Most people make their decision on what they can handle–not what God actually can equip them for…. Great post.
I really loved this post. I always thought we would have 2 kids but now that we have 2 do we want 3. Twins kinda thru a kink in the whole process. One pregnancy…one CRAZY pregnancy. Do we try for more? I can't imagine my life without my girls and how much love & happiness they bring. I would imagine that more kids bring more love & happiness. So…maybe…
Excellent post. I identify with so many of your thoughts and feelings.
Our first was born 10 months after our wedding day. It was never our vision, but that is the way everything fell together and I wouldn’t change a thing. We never intended to have a big family, either. In fact, we were done after our second child was born. We had a girl and a boy. What more could we want?
#7 is on board. Everyone is so excited. Truly, the more, the merrier. I would have never believed this 10 years ago.
VERY well said! Ive ALWAYS wanted at least 4 and when Liv’s dad cheated and then asked me to leave I thought for sure I was done.. Then God blessed me with John and #2 and now #3 is on the way. We dont know when we’ll be done either, just that we’re praying and trusting God with the end number.
I will prepare a post for tomorrow. Tonight is my first night back to work in about 5 months, so it’s crazy!
Thank you for sharing your story, you inspire me. š
I have a strict rule that says that I don’t have to think on Mondays. So I shouldn’t have come here because while I enjoyed this post immensely, you’ve made me think today.
I recently blogged about my youngest and her delivery which, while I didn’t come right out and say it, was the deciding factor in us not having any more children. Money and time and patience and age also played a part but it was my flighty and rebellious uterus that clinched the deal. And even though a lot of the “choice” was taken out of the equation because of that one body part, it still wasn’t an easy decision to make. It was excruciating, in fact. Eight years have passed and it’s still painful. I feel blessed to have two healthy, wonderful girls. But every so often, I still find myself grieving just a tiny bit for what might have been.
Thank you for your beautiful post! I don’t know if I’ve asked you that question or not, but I know I’ve asked it of others and now, even with only one, get it myself. “How many do you think you’ll have?” I can honestly say that I don’t know, but it took one blurred birth high to transform everything I’d ever thought about families and motherhood. A great birth experience coupled with a healthy precious baby boy sent me soaring into the world of mommyhood rapidly! I honestly felt like I had changed into a different person over night.
After the birth, as I put away my hospital bag and all the items I had anxiously packed getting ready for the big day to arrive, I started to tear up. When would I pull it out again?! Even with a one week old child, I was looking forward to the next! Who was this crazy woman I had become?
Like you, my feelings about parenthood changed when I met and was surrounded by mothers of many whom I greatly admired. Thank you for being one of them!
So, I don’t know how many I’ll have or how many God will bless us with, but I know that it is truly holy ground to build a family. And what gets me is looking into my sweet son’s face and thinking God chose me out of all the women in the whole world to be your mommy. What a commission, what mercy and grace, what a gift! And one I hope and pray to receive over and over. In one of our Orthodox prayers, we thank God, “Thou hast made me worthy to be the mother of a family,” and it is truly one of the things I am most thankful for in life, and in awe of.
Sorry for the long, rambling comment!
Okay… Here I go. For much of my marriage, I have not let God do the guiding… I have resisted… I have made my own decisions about when to “try” to conceive and found out that I can’t control it. I’ve waited until the time was ‘right,’ only to realize it’s not my call. I’ve had one miscarriage. And what bothers me most is that I haven’t tried enough, and now I am 46 (soon to be 47). It makes me sad that my sweet daughter doesn’t have siblings. And she loves younger children so much… So I’m sad and wish I had read your post a decade ago, although this has been lurking in my mind for years. Yea you for living the life God has set forth for you! For following the path He has laid before you!
amazing! i loved this. enough that i might sit my hubby down and make him read it with an open mind.
i started out wanting a big family. i still want a big family. we are currently holding at 6 and i am personally debating whether having more is the smart thing to do. i have 4 out of 6 with ADHD and are medicated. along with me. all 6 have had tubes one or more times. along with the recurrent ear infections. and 2 have been in speech with one more in need. pending eval. so is it smart for us to have more? i struggle.i want more. at least 2. one would be fine but i am SURE i’d want another one. i don’t want to wait to long. and yet we are low budget, and will probably always be low budget. let’s face it there is never enough money with a big family. my house is a wreck. i can’t keep up. and frankly barely attempt. my husband thinks the money and the house are enough reason to wait. i’m cranky, have always struggled with depression, and lack of focus. add it up he has a valid point. but my heart says i need a new baby. i love babies. i guess i could get over it, but i still struggle with it.
i don’t love that question. are you done? and yet i always ask it. i am so rude. we are currently holding. since we are at an impasse. although my husband would be fine if we got pregnant accidentally, OH and he about croaked when i was all set to give away my maternity wear. sure that would bring on a surprise. i will post about this tomorrow. i’ve been thinking alot about this lately. and apparently have lots to say about it.
Great post!!
I hear that question, a lot.
The answer is- nope. #7 will be here April 30th.
Hubs thought we were done after #1. This from the man who wanted 12.
I thought we were done after #3. We both were slightly suprised but overwhelmingly happy with #4, #5, #6 and now #7. š
Hi there. I’m so sorry not to write my own post on this again this week. I’m in Nashville and Memphis this week with Mom! This is a lovely question. Here’s a bit of a secret (not too much-but a wow!) Jason and I permanently decided not to have kids, and then changed our minds. Will and Abby are then IVF babies. We think about this often, because, we’ll if we hadn’t made the decisions we did, we wouldn’t have those children. We would have some other children… perhaps not two, not twins. I believe that everything happens for a reason, and we were meant to do it this way. Now we have our two lovely wonderful children (which is a stretch today… š boy were they BAD! š
PS-sometimes I would love to know what it’s like to have and love a single baby… but the way we’d have to do it… it’d surely be twins again. And I don’t think I could handle that again!
What a nice post. We have 6. I guess we are a bit more spiritual about it and feel that we will have how many we are meant to have. I too have had hard pregnancies. I too have had better pregnancies. I too have had pregnancies that have brought me to my knees. Somehow, each baby brings more love to our home…as well as more choas and laundry of course! I like how you put it, “how can I be stretched?” Well put!
Wow, it’s so nice to meet another parent with 8 kids! I am pregnant with my 8th child, due in March. I didn’t give birth to all, I am on my 5th pregnancy, didnt plan on having anymore than two or three kids, life would be alot easier if that’s all we had, but hey, what’s one more when you’ve already got 7. Oh we get the looks, the comments, the butt of everybodys jokes. But so, it’s our life, this is how we choose to live it. We do it all on our own without any help. And I’m proud of that. Why do we have so many? I guess GOD knows more about what he’s doing that we do! Haha!
I posted about this at my site. A subject close to my heart.
What a great post!!! I can’t imagine doing what you do and obviously with the grace and patience you do. My Grandmother had 8 kids and did it great as well! I love that you don’t get offended by the questions but can understand where they are coming from. Personally, I think one should have any many children as they want and can be happy with. If that 1 great, if that is 10 great.
I know my Mother treasures each one of her siblings and we get to have big crazy family gatherings thanks to my grandparents having had 8 kids!
Hey there! In from Seven Clown Circus, and if Angie likes you, then I’m sure I will too!
I’d so love to write this kind of post. It won’t happen today though…I’ll send a linkback your way when it does though…
I’m rootin’ for ya. Funny thing is I was raised in a family of 10 kids and really NEVER wanted a large family. We have three!
Ta, Ta
Have I mentioned lately how much I love reading your blog? This is a question I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. We have one beautiful, precious little girl. I have a sweet, handsome stepson 16yrs her elder. We would like at least one more, and thought a few times we were on our way, but not yet. After that, we will have faith and see what happens.
I didn’t realize how much I would love being a mom, and I NEVER thought I would want a big family. Now that we have one, I know I want another, and I’m not saying no after that, just “we’ll see”.
Blessings to you and your precious family!
Steph
that really was amazing to read! You are an inspiration to me!
I love this post. I love that you let the Lord lead you in your decisions. I cannot think of a better way to plan your family! This was really beautiful to read. I only have two and I know there will be more. I am going to write a post on this soon so I will come get Mr. Linky. Thank you for sharing your story.
Ok! Finally my post in answer to your question is up! I hope you don’t mind that I quoted you on a few of the things you said…giving proper credit and listing my source, of course. I used that Mr. Linky thingy :0) Blessings!
I will be posting on this topic… you have me in tears… as you have spoken my heart in a way that is difficult for me to express to some people. I have the words, I have the passion, but… I have not had it all together like that. It is a relief and pleasure and blessing to know that i am not alone in these sentiments. I have been in so many of the places that you seem to have been, and i agree. without those experiences, no matter how difficult, I would not be whom GOD has created me to be today. I am blessed because of His faithfulness. I am in awe of His goodness towards me, and in His faithfulness to stretch BEYOND what i thought i could be stretched or grown to. I would not, could not, go back. And i love that God knows what is better for us, even when we sometimes do not agree at first. Thank you for this post. I am overwhelmed into tears of blessing… and… I love you disclaimer. sigh… thank you again. blessings upon blessing be upon you and yours… š
“…to grow me up…” Exactly!
I don’t think I have completely covered this topic on my blog yet. I am open about how we are trusting God and always will. (never use birth control again) But we are also working broken, as my husband had a vasectomy after number 5, and then a reversal. Things are not quite right for easy conceptions now. It is heartbreaking to live with the consequences of our sin, especially after being forgiven. Consequences continue on.
I think having 7 kids was necessary for us to get through our “junk” and grow up and become more Christ-like. Since we still have a ways to go, I hope that means more children on the horizon!
(disclaimer, for us the vascetomy was sin because my husband had made a covenant with God not to ever use birth control, and after two more children he wasn’t walking closely with the Lord and broke it.)
What a lovely post. Thanks to SuburbanCorrespondent for bringing it to my attention.
Isn’t it funny that people always ask that question. My answer was always, “I don’t know.” My twins came in at numbers 6 and 7. Along with that pregnancy came a serious health problem that mode it highly unlikely I would be around to raise numbers 1 through 7 if there was a number 8. After all those years I was afraid that I would mourn the loss of my child bearing years, but I have only felt contentment. I guess He knows what He is doing.
Wow- this is a really beautiful post. Just what I needed to read. I have been “struggling” so much lately with- should we be done? shouldn’t we? And the more I think about it- the more I try to put the control in my hands, and the more I stress out about it! That, I suppose, is why it’s best to just trust God with your whole heart- and let Him be the one to decide. I love the way you write! I am so glad I found your blog!
Oh, I love this post. We only have 4. Our first was a surprise and we thought she’d be our only. Our 2nd became our 2nd and 3rd! Then we were sure we were done, and we got our 4th.
We made the “final decision,” and while there is part of me that is relieved to know I won’t have to go thru pregnancy again… I would be overjoyed to have more kids around. I tell everyone, don’t make any final decisions. I imagine #5 would be on the way now, if we hadn’t.
What an amazing post. I have blogged about this several times, but your words are far more powerful. I have tears in my eyes reading this.
This is an incredible post. We only have two, so no large family for us, for long and complicated and probably a few selfish reasons on my part. I’m going to be posting about this on Monday and linking back to you. Thanks for writing this so wonderfully.
What a great post. It’s funny, I get this question all the time and I only have 3 children! When I respond that, no, we’re probably not done, people act like I’m crazy…I can only imagine the looks I’ll get when we’re up to number 4 or 5. I don’t know how to decide to stop. If it were about money, we’d have stopped after 1 or 2…
This is the most gorgeous post ever. Thank you so much.
I have always wanted 5 or 6 children but my hubby would be done with our 3 right now. I’ve said many of the things you have written here to him before but I think I would like to have him read this. It is such a walk of faith to have children. Any number of children. I would so much prefer God to be in charge and decide our family for us. Leave our lives completely open to his plan. Being very fertile people, that worries my hubby. But I really feel we have no worries with God on our side.
Seriously beautiful post. I have tears in my eyes even now reading this. I am so glad I clicked over from Jaysi’s blog.
I just watched a show on tv last night about a couple that has 17 children who ended up getting two dogs to throw into the mix. The mom said, “After having 17 children I know that when you have an opportunity to multiply your love, you take it.” I thought that was awesome.
Thanks again!
I am new to your blog but this was a good post. I was told that we could not have kids and now we have 3. God is so good.
Beautiful post!!
I have people ask me all the time if we’re done. I thought it was because of the loud little stars orbiting me– turns out it’s because my belly still looks a little pregnant :-{
This is a lovely and wonderful post. It is also painful, as a couple that is unable to bear children. But I can say that there were 2 miracles born in Korea that came to be our children. And had our life circumstances been different they would have been here (on earth), but they wouldn’t have been HERE.
This is really beautiful. We had our first (unexpectedly) at 17. Then, we were told we would most likely never have any more. Eight years later we had our daughter. Five years later I just did not feel ‘done’. Three years later along came out second son. ‘Let’s see what happens’ turned into number 4. My hubby is firmly done now, but my heart wishes he wasn’t. I would love to leave it in God’s hands. At the same time, I recognize the financial toll that it has taken, but in all the truly important ways, we’re fine. I feel sad, and at times a little guilty that we’re not going to be able to help with college much, but we’ve given them an excellent foundation. Hopefully we’ll figure it out together.
Truly a beautiful post. I wish more people could see the wisdom in this.
thank you for this post. I tried to be done after 3. I thought it was selfish to want more since #1 is special needs and by #3 we had both girls and a boy but when my DH talked about setting up his big V appointment I fell to pieces sobbing. No matter how hard I tried to talk myself into it, I wasn’t done. 4 came a fast surprise and here I am still wanting more. I didn’t start out wanting a huge brood but it’s amazing how the right man and a few kids can change your heart
WOW! I have recently promised my readers a “Why Do You Have So Many Kids?” post, and you pretty much wrote here everything I was rolling around in my head!
In answer to THE question, I like to say, “You’ve heard of extreme sports, right? We practice extreme faith!”
This is so beautiful. As a mom of two little ones and another on the way, I’ve always been called to be open to life and to see children as blessings, not burden. Still, there are nights I sit in bed awake and start to calculate how many more fertile years we have and if I’m up to the task. But, as you said so well, it’s about trust. It’s about how far can I be stretched, how open can I be to God’s graces.
Thank you for encouraging newbie moms like myself.
God bless you and your beautiful brood!
–Kate
Very interesting… We just found out that our miracle second is another boy, and I have to say that my interest in having a third went up exponentially after discovering I wasn’t going to get a pink nursery… again. =) But, seriously, we have been thinking a lot about how to figure out how many children God has suited us for. Infertility has been a huge factor in our lives, so it may not be in our hands at all, but we’re still thinking about it.
My strong commitment to homeschooling is a huge factor in this. I want to give them a high quality education, and I worry that I couldn’t do that if we had a lot of children. Maybe I’m fearful, and I’m maybe I’m realistic. Maybe God has equipped me for that, and maybe I don’t know it yet. Or maybe He shaped me with a particular temperment and style that wouldn’t be best suited for that.
Most people with large families don’t come out and say that they thought they were done after each one. Sometimes it seems like they make it look like they had this big, bold plan all along, and that’s off putting and a little scary. Thanks for being honest and showing that the kids came after consideration and prayer each time. =)
Just a note to let you know that I thought your post on this topic was very well done. I am the father of six children under the age of nine. With our sixth, we have decided that if our family will continue to grow, it will likely be through adoption. It is interesting how freely the opinions tend to flow from people that assume you are from the maximum quiverful party and those that think you are nuts for overpopulating the neighborhood playground. Both groups only do the math and miss the smiles and jokes and messes that add brilliant color to the number. The one thing that my children have produced in me is the vital importance of hope. I am just God’s agent in the shepherding of these children. And through the hits and misses of my parenting journey, it is the hope that God has a plan for them that supercedes my meager efforts that keeps me going.
As I type this, I recognize that this appears to be a semi-rant from a first time reader of your blog. But thanks for your post. It was a bright spot in my morning routine.
Chris
I really appreciate the way you make a distinction between making decisions in faith vs. making decisions based in fear. My husband and I contemplating kids (we’re newly married) and this will be very helpful to us. Thank you.
I love the way you explained how you got where you are today. I have 7 children and get asked all the time why I have so many or will you have any more? How do you respond to someone and share with them your deep faith? You shared quite eloquently and encouraged me today. Thank you!
Hi.
I appreciated how you talked about “being stretched” by another one.
We have always been open to having a larger family. After our second one was born I remember thinking that handling 2 was nearly impossible so how did I think I could handle more? Yet almost as soon as I had that second one I was looking forward to a third.
Since those early days with a newborn and toddler I have come to the realization that I can’t “handle” these children on my own – I need God’s grace. I will seek Him for grace for each one that He blesses me with.
May there be more!
HI! I was directed here by Boundless Grace. I love this post. This is a subject very close to my heart. Here is the post I wrote explaining why.
http://dyessfamchronicles.blogspot.com/2008/05/epilogue-to-boys-birth-stories-taking.html
We thought we were done after two, but God changed all that for us and now we are expecting #3 at the end of next month.:) I do hope that God gives us about a year’s reprieve from pregnancy before sending any more blessings our way, but if He decides to give us another before that, then we trust in His decision to do so! I love the freedom that brings!!!
Amen, sistah! We had our first eight with a truly fabulous family doc who supported our “take what we get” policy with such warm enthusiasm that he offered to — and did — deliver the half-dozenth for free. But then we moved to Atlanta, and even the most grandmultipara-friendly OB I could find stunned me by asking whether he could tie my tubes after delivering Number Nine. I was too flabbergasted to be offended: what rationale could there possibly be for drawing the line between Nine and Ten? As it turned out, that was indeed our finish line…but we let God draw it.
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